The last two days I've been talking about the ways in which people approach the major changes in life. We can either flail against the dying of the light or we can accept the changes with honor and our heads held high. I still do not know which of these is better. If we accept the changes with merely a whimper, are we possibly wasting something that could be really good? If we choose to go out on our own terms, are we throwing something away? For example, if Derek Jeter had hung the spikes up last year during one of the worst years of his career, as many people were calling for him to do, he would never have been able to experience the career renaissance that he has this season. Where do we draw the line between the possibility of things left on the table and the grim reality that enough is enough?
Yesterday, Lance Armstrong was kicked out of cycling, stripped of his seven Tour de France titles, and had his Olympic gold medal taken away. He has been dodging doping allegations for years and years and was recently drawn up on charges by the U.S. Anti-Doping Agency. He's been fighting these charges for the better part of two years and decided that he had had enough. He dropped his appeals and released a statement saying, "There comes a time in every man's life when he has to say 'enough is enough.' For me that time is now." Lance gave up the fight to permanently clear his name because it was getting in the way of his current life's calling - taking care of his family and keeping the Livestrong foundation going. Is this right? Should he have done this? He still claims that he never took performance enhancers. If this is true and to be believed, why would he quit now? Why would he give up his fight? Armstrong is known as a man who never quit. Just watch this link if you need another reminder...
How are we to analyze this situation? Is Armstrong bowing out gracefully, retiring on his own terms? Or is he quitting, potentially leaving a lot on the table? Or is it some muddled gray area...retiring, but not exactly on his own terms...but at least he hasn't been completely humiliated? You know, I think a lot of life is made up of those muddled gray areas. Maybe that's why it's so difficult to figure life out fully in the first place. When things aren't purely black and white, there ceases to be a clearly defined choice. We have to choose between black (with conditions), white (with other conditions), or several shades of gray in the middle. It's a headache.
There's a song lyric that I was just thinking of..."Making good decisions is easy when you haven't got a choice." When there's no other factor influencing us in anyway, we can easily make an informed decision...and it will inevitably turn out good, mostly because there was no alternative. Of course it may all be perspective and the result of a positive mindset, but it should turn out good, at the very least. But here's the thing - there is always another choice. Even sitting back and doing nothing is a choice. It's the choice that Lance Armstrong made. Though to him there may seem to be no other choice, there was an alternative. There always has been and there always will be.
Let's talk about Rickey Henderson again, who we briefly touched on yesterday. He still played semipro ball for years after his last MLB game and, according to Wikipedia, is still holding out for that golden opportunity to come back and play at the highest level, even at the ripe old age of 53. He is refusing to accept that his time is done. Isn't that to be applauded? Isn't this a great outlook to have? Shouldn't we never, never, never give up on our dreams, even in the face of adversity and people who tell us that we can't achieve? This is what I've been taught from a young age. It's the American dream. It's a celebrated ideal. So then why are we lauding Chipper Jones as well, for doing the exact opposite thing? He's turning down a sure contract offer, in the midst of another great Chipper season, and riding off into the sunset. I've also been taught this life lesson - to quit while you're ahead, and of your own volition. Quitting on top is a celebrated ideal as well. How am I supposed to keep these two ideals balanced?
There's no answer, but that's not the biggest point of today's update. I want to talk about rejuvenation. Whether we retire or are fired, we have to regroup and, like it or not, embrace what is coming next. Sometimes we don't know what that "next" is, but it always comes...and it's never shy about it. Whether we are approaching these changes because we've brought them upon ourselves i.e. Chipper's retirement, or brought them upon ourselves in another way i.e. losing our skills and becoming something/body else, or had the decision made for us, we must accept the subsequent changes. That may be the hardest part of this process. Actually I'm sure that it's the hardest part. Retirement and termination both bring about the same results - a new direction in life.
Maybe this will change, but I think I know which way I'm leaning on this debate, but I certainly don't have a definitive answer. I'm in a state of flux, continually thinking about ways to approach certain situations and sometimes being proven right, while, more often it seems, sometimes being proven wrong. But neither way matters right now. It's about the rejuvenation process. It's a natural process and accepting it is the first step toward success. It's an interesting thought, to me at least, but as much as humans fear change and the unknown, we pine for success. We love it. And whenever we have that opportunity to grab success again, be it in a different avenue or not, we would be remiss not to take it. Right?
Conclusions are not really my forte. Luckily I don't need to make one today. Many of us don't need to, but it's something to think about. And whenever we're bogged down by that fear of fear itself, remember the rejuvenation that is going to come from it. It may be found in friends, family, a personal faith, personal goals, travelling, or from many other things. But we can be rejuvenated. It will be hard. There will be trials and thoughts that it's all too much. But let yourself become whole again and, it's my sincerest hope, it will prove to be worth it.
I wish I could have an answer. But whatever way we decide to approach change will be hard. And the rejuvenation could be doubly so.
The immortal words of Jimmy Dugan from A League of Their Own seem like an appropriate farewell:
"It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard...is what makes it great."
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