Working Things Out

I've heard it said recently that it might be a good idea to avoid trying to force something to work and instead letting things work out the way that they are supposed to.  I initially balked at that notion.  I thought that that was a silly way to approach life, leaving too much up to chance when we can make an effort to achieve what we really want.  But slowly my attitude began to change, a process that I will attempt to illustrate in the forthcoming...

At first, I thought that leaving things up to pure chance was a nonsense endeavor.  Who's to say that we will get what we want?  I mean, maybe we will get what's coming for us, or what we supposedly "deserve," but is that what we expect to define us?  It makes me feel like I don't have any control in my life, that everything that happens is a sequence of random actions and inactions.  It was a very disconcerting emotion to have.  If there is something that I definitely want to get out of life, wouldn't it be most prudent for me to go for the gusto and give it everything I've got?  Resting on my laurels and waiting around for the things that we want to find us on their own seemed like a bizarre proposition.

Then I started to think that even if we work non-stop trying to get a certain thing in life, wouldn't whatever happens to us become what is supposed to happen?  If I was totally behind the idea that whatever is going to happen will eventually happen, then haven't my actions already been anticipated and thrown into the equation when thinking about the things that are going to occur?  Of course there is the religious perspective in that everything has already been planned, but even that leaves tons of room for leeway.  Since you or I do not know for certain any plan that may have been mapped out for us, we could easily adopt the perspective that the things that actually did happen in our life were supposed to happen.  We tend to not look at our lives and say, "Hmm...that wasn't supposed to happen."  Thinking that that was not the way things were supposed to work out doesn't mean that's not the way that they turned out.  At some point we need to accept the reality of the situation and grasp the fact that perhaps what we dreaded or desired or anything in between was, in all actuality, the way things were supposed to go down.  Am I wrong here?

All of this originally led me to subscribe to the belief that if something is going to happen that we really want, we must work for it.  It's not going to fall into our lap.  If I want to be a world-class distance runner, I'm not going to instantly become better just by thinking that's the way things are supposed to turn out.  But here's the thing: it's also not guaranteed if we actively try our hardest to make it happen.  If I woke up every single day to run 15 miles at sub-6:00 pace, that does not necessarily mean that I am going to become an Olympic caliber runner.  It will help, for sure, but practicing can only take us so far.  I believe this is true in most fields that require repetition and practice.  There's always going to be an added piece thrown in there that we can't control, especially luck, good genes, and myriad other outlying factors that are independent of the man-hours put into success.

So what is my ultimate conclusion then?  I've already stated at the beginning that I think I'm starting to come around to the stock put in fate or whatever you want to call it, but with one caveat - it doesn't mean giving up on what you want to do.  Perhaps it's just something to keep us occupied, since whatever is supposed to happen is going to happen regardless.  But on the off-chance that maybe, just maybe, the work that we put into our lives can have a bearing on what ultimately occurs in life, then I want to be ready to leap on it.  Just as practice alone will not make a good runner, so too will good genes and a predisposition to running fast not solely make you a good runner.  Both parts need to be in concert with each other. 

We can sit back and let things happen to us, as they will whether we are active in their happenings or not.  We can also pursue our goals, dreams, wanderings, or whatever else thrills us.  Both are worthy ways to approach it.  But I'm realizing that they are two sides to one coin.  To achieve the pinnacle of success, we need to have both.  The ability to accept the things that happens to us, and the gumption to keep persevering in the face of hardships.  When these two are in harmony with each other, we have the most control over our own lives.