The Good, The Bad...

So I've been all about packing it in and throwing in the towel.  But then I realized I was here for awhile.  So why not keep it going?  But now...ugh I'm so confused.  I'm not secure enough to toss it in.  Too nice?  Too...something else?  And now it's happening, and not of my own doing, and I'm struggling.  Not too much though, which is fortunate.  Though that might be because I'm literally going to die from sickness at any second.  Hmm.  We'll see how this goes.